Wagel was never meant to be.

My bagel hunger needed to be satisfied, but with rain and a bad case of “I really don’t want to get dressed right now” I was having trouble leaving the house. Normally in this situation I would turn to good old reliable bacon. Bacon knows what I like. Bacon gets the job done.
But I discovered we have no bacon. In fact, we have very little of anything. I pulled things out of the fridge hoping that maybe some old rolls or a hardened mass of mashed potatoes could stand in for the bagel I craved. No such luck. Until I spied, at the back of the fridge, some old waffle batter. I won’t say how old it was, but when I pulled it out it said, “Hey, how’s it going?”
Could a waffle be the answer?
Or could it be… even more?
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Here is my creation: the Wagel. Half waffle, half bagel. Covered in butter and Nutella.
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Here I am tentatively testing out my creation. I had to be firm, but gentle, and sensitive to the Wagel’s needs.
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Here I am crying in anguish at the chocolate covered lie that I spawned. Wagel never should have been.
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Here I am greedily devouring the chocolate covered lie that never should have been. And if you don’t think that lies taste like butter and chocolate and give you a bit of stomach ache when you are done then you are deluding yourself.

15 thoughts on “Wagel was never meant to be.

  1. I didn’t even know they made Nutella anymore. I haven’t had it in over two decades. As a kid, I ate the hell out of it. They have a similar spread in Germany that I ate when I was eight years old and visiting Luxemburg. It was nasty. Maybe because it was German chocolate. *ba dum bum* Joke aside, it’s true.

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